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Read on to know what happens to men who marry in India

Posts Tagged ‘connecticut’

Wife declares husband Dead for Pension

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 31, 2008

Indian women are great – they can go to any extent for their selfish motives. Wife declares the husband dead for getting his pension money and now the husband is running arond courts to prove that he is alive!

‘Dead’ man in legal battle to prove he’s alive

30 Dec 2008, 1632 hrs IST, PTI

http://timesofindia .indiatimes. com/India/ Dead_man_ in_legal_ battle_to_ prove_hes_ alive/articlesho w/3913610. cms

KHARAR, PUNJAB: Sital Singh Bagi’s life sounds like a script of a Bollywood masala flick.

The 67-year-old ex-IAF man has been fighting a nine-year legal battle to prove that he is the “real” Sital Singh Bagi and not “dead” as his family had got him declared after he fled home allegedly to escape terrorists and did not surface for a decade.

A retired warrant officer of Indian Air Force (IAF), Bagi claimed he was settled with his family and owned a milk dairy in Delhi when three terrorists confronted him in December 1987 and asked him to join their group.

The terrorists threatened to kill him and a terrorized Bagi left his wife and four children at his ancestral house in Gurdittpura village in Patiala and fled, he claimed.

Bagi said he went to Orissa, where he spent 3-4 years, and then moved to Kolkata, before going to Dhaka in Bangladesh, where he became a priest at Gurdwara Nanak Shahi.

Bagi said he returned to his native place in December 1998 as he was “no longer afraid”, but his wife refused to recognize him and so did his children..

They also threatened him with “dire consequences” , if he again approached them, Bagi alleged.

He then went to the IAF authorities for release of his pension, but was shocked when he was told that his name was struck off the pension rolls and his wife was getting the pension after she produced a court decree declaring him dead.

Bagi moved a civil court in Rajpura in 1999 to get the decree declared null and void and for restoration of pension.

Though the court prevented Bagi’s wife from further withdrawing the family pension it reserved its order on the previous court decree pronounced in November 1996.

IAF officer incharge (Pensions) Wg Cdr P.R. Sudhakar said that Bagi had “reappeared” but his pension could not be restored till a decision on the civil suit comes.

In a statement filed before the court, the IAF officials had not disputed the identity of Bagi while Naseeb Kaur said that she cannot say that plaintiff is same Sital Singh with whom she got married.

Though Bagi’s claim was corroborated by Gurdittpura village sarpanch Mohan Singh and two other villagers in court, Bagi’s wife and children have yet to conclude their evidence.

Bagi’s counsel Rajinder Singh Raju said the case is in advanced stage and February 15 has been fixed as next date of hearing. “We have produced documentary and physical evidence beyond any doubt to prove that Bagi is alive,” Raju said.

Bagi also filed a complaint before Patiala police in July 2008 against his wife and sons seeking criminal action but the police asked him to pursue his case in the court.

Left with no source of income or shelter, Bagi is now being taken care of by one of his old service mates in Chamkaur Sahib, near Ropar.

“I procured evidence of several of my service colleagues and native village head, but I’m still waiting for the court order,” he rued.

However, Naseeb says, “I got married to Sital Singh and two sons were born from our wedlock but I cannot say this man is my husband or not.”

“My husband disappeared in 1987. I lodged his missing report with the police and after he failed to appear, I got a police investigation report certifying that he could not be traced despite their best efforts.”

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Aamir Khan starrer Ghajini creates problems for married men

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 31, 2008

Aamir Khan starrer Ghajini is creating problems for married men. Wives are getting ever-new ideas to control their husbands……

new-gajini1

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Do people get justice in courts?

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 30, 2008

With 2.94 crore cases pending in the Indian courts, can people really expect to get a justice during their lifetime?

12/29/2008
http://www.indlawnews.com/Newsdisplay.aspx?b294f581 -f66f-459c-affb-c0518a3caf82

Supreme Court Judge S B Sinha said as many as 2.94 crore cases, including petty cases, were pending with the court till date.

Addressing a two-day inauguration meeting on the legal awareness programme on mediation, human rights and social development for judicial officers organised by A P State Legal Services Authority, Chittoor district Legal Services Authority in collaboration with the Department of Human Rights and Social Development (S V University),
the Justice said all the pending cases will be disposed by 2020 and the awareness training attended by judges from Andhra Pradesh will be useful to settle the cases early at regional level instead of the Supreme Court.

There is no civil courts in America and having only criminal courts but whereas 70 per cent of the cases belongs to civil and remaining 30 per cent are criminal and others are registering at various courts in the country while some of the cases including family cases can be settled at their village level itself with the assistance of police, he added.

All necessary steps have been taken to settle the cases through mobile courts in Andhra Pradesh, Andhra Pradesh High Court Chief Justice Anil Ramesh Dave said .

Among those who participated in the inaugural meeting were Andhra Pradesh High Court Judge and Chairperson of A P State Legal Services Authority Justice Meenakumari, APHLSC Chairman Justice D S R Varma and all District Judges of Andhra Pradesh.

UNI

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Girl kills boyfriend with help of new boyfriend

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 29, 2008

These are the women we call ‘Abla Nari’ in my country – who go around killing their old boyfriends with the help of new ones….

Dehradun: An army official was stabbed to death allegedly by his former girlfriend and her companion at the hill resort of Mussoorie in Uttarakhand, the police said on Sunday.

Two persons — Aparna Shahi and her boyfriend Ankit Thakur — have been arrested for stabbing to death Sunder Swaroop Sharma, a Warrant Officer in the Indian Army. The murder came to light when the police discovered the blood-stained body of Sharma on Saturday at Hathipaon area of Mussoorie. On investigations, it was found that Sharma was having an alleged affair with Aparna, a student of a polytechnic college in Dehra Dun. When Aparna was grilled, she revealed that she along with her new boyfriend Ankit killed Sharma and threw the body into a gorge. She said Sharma was allegedly harassing her after she snapped relations with him last year. When the harassment continued, both Ankit and Aparna invited Sharma to Mussoorie where they killed the official with a khukhri, police said. The two would be produced before a district court for police remand on Monday. PTI

http://epaper.dnaindia.com/dnabangalore/newsview.aspx?eddate=12/29/2008&pageno=15&edition=9&prntid=572&bxid=27958344&pgno=15

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Domestic violence claims men too

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 24, 2008

And they call it a man’s world? Indian men are victims of domestic violence too but can not even come out in open and cry like women do!

http://timesofindia .indiatimes. com/Bangalore/ Domestic_ violence_ claims_men_ too/articleshow/ 3876342.cms

BANGALORE: Family problems are the cause of most suicides in the country. While the number of suicides increased by 28% over the last decade, they went up by 3.8% in the past year. Only 5% of these are attributed to financial
reasons while family problems triggered 23.8%, according to the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) which recently published the 2007 statistics.

Members of the Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF) on Monday drew attention to these statistics, which also show that every year, the number of men committing suicide is much higher than that of women.

More married men (57,593) committed suicide last year than married women (30,064). “In 11 years, 1,56,000 married men killed themselves due to domestic violence. Yet, the government doesn’t feel the need to protect
them. Society ridicules them as weak and irresponsible and cites financial reasons as the cause of their suicide. Also, there is a hue and cry when women commit suicide and the husbands’ family is dragged to the police station on suspicion that they must have forced her to suicide. For men, there is hardly any investigation, ” said Anil Kumar, secretary, SIFF.

The organization urged the government to set up a men’s welfare ministry and a national commission for men to study the problems, allocate a men’s budget, provide homes for those trapped in domestic violence, among other things.

Members of Children’s Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting (CRISP), a sister concern of SIFF, identified that men not allowed custody of their children was also an issue of concern leading to stress and depression among divorced men and, in some cases, suicide.

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Parents worsen rocky marriages

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 24, 2008

I completely agree: Shruti’s parents were so protective about their daughter that they wanted to control everything that happens in her life even after marriage. If they would not have interfered,  probably my wife and I would have understood each other and have had a happy married life.

*”Unwanted advice of parents should be avoided while tackling crisis situations in a relationship”*

A report published by a Florida-based marriage counsellor said parents may invariably accelerate the break up process if a marriage is on the rocks. “Unwanted advice of parents should be avoided while tackling crisis situations in a relationship. The couples ought to be independent to make their own decisions,” it said.

Dr Rajan Bhonsle, a Mumbaibased marriage counsellor says, “Parents are very possessive about their children. Somehow, they become jealous of the new person in their children’s life. They don’t want to give away their children
even after marriage and keep pouring in advice — which very often is one of the major causes of a marriage break up.” He feels the situation can become more vulnerable in the initial stage of a marriage, as there is a lack of understanding already, and parents’ biased advice just adds to it. This becomes an even bigger problem when the other partner is not liked by the parents.

However, Dr Jyoti Sangle, visiting psychiatrist at Hiranandani Hospital says, “A marriage is made between two mature individuals. They need to be responsible, and so you can’t solely blame parental advice for a split.” She says that parents always have a soft corner for their child, and so they often fail to analyse the situation rationally. It is also because there are so many personal and social emotions attached.

“Importantly, if a marriage is under stress, parents need to be informed about it. But always seek advice from professionals — someone who can look at the situation objectively, like marriage counsellors,” adds Dr Sangle.

Dr Bhonsle warns that as a mature individuals, couples must communicate with each other regularly and openly, as a lack of communication only adds to the problem. “Selfishness, ingratitude and lack of understanding are the
hallmarks of an unhappy marriage,” he adds, “And in this case, it is vital that the couple be independent enough to take their decisions.” Dr Sangle adds, “When you see problems in your marriage, always seek professional help. But understanding, communication and respect is important to keep a marriage alive.”
http://www.dc-epaper.com/DC/DCB/2008/12/23/ArticleHtmls/23_12_2008_110_004.shtml?Mode=1

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Women cling to clothes longer than marriages

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 24, 2008

Women cling to clothes longer than hubbies

22 Dec 2008, 0000 hrs IST, ANI
http://timesofindia .indiatimes. com/Lifestyle/ Women_cling_ to_clothes_ longer_than_ hubbies/articles how/3797516. cms

Women keep their favourite piece of clothing for an average of 12 years – which is longer than the length of many marriages – according to a British survey.

The study also confirmed what many men already knew – despite splashing thousands of pounds on clothes women only wear a third of their wardrobe. The woman’s favourite item, which on an average costs less than 50 pounds, is kept for 12 years, the research for The Clothes Show Live revealed.

It may be a skirt, a dress, or a pair of shoes, but it is what a woman will feel the most attractive in, reports the Telegraph . The finding underlines the deep attachment many feel to particular pieces of clothing.

Gavin Brown, the show’s managing director, said, “It seems that women have a lasting affinity with their wardrobes – 12 years is a long time in the shelf life of an item of clothing.”

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College life goes beyond kisses

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 24, 2008

Contrary to the common belief that boys are more sexual,  Read on to find out that girls are more characterless as compared to boys: “the percentage of non-virgins in the age group of 18 to 20 is 65.6 among girls and 63.3 among  boys”

BANGALORE, 24 DECEMBER: A quick kiss goodnight in the front seat of a car is where it all begins.  Running home after a hug in a crowded street, snuggling at the movie theatre  or holding hands while walking through a mall, relationships are becoming
more public by the second, and also more intimate.

Long gone are the days when relationships meant merely spending time with  one another. They have taken on new meanings today with the physical aspect in the spotlight.  Pre-marital sex is no longer considered a taboo among youngsters. According  to a survey conducted by Avishkaar, a counselling clinic, the percentage of
non-virgins in the age group of 18 to 20 is 65.6 among girls and 63.3 among  boys
.

“Youngsters get carried away in the heat of the moment”, says Viren  Michael, a law student. Be it a social gathering or a party, if the  opportunity presents itself, youngsters on certain occasions can’t stop, or  say no, adds Viren.
Knowledge and exposure have triggered curiosity among teens. Unanswered or  wrongly answered curiosity can result in consequences such as Sexually  Transmitted Diseases (STDs) and unwanted pregnancies. “Youngsters must be
informed about contraceptive methods and STDs to make them responsible, ”  says Dr Chandra Mansukhani, a gynaecologist.

A survey of 20 college students in the city reveals that today’s teenagers  are willing to experiment with sex. When asked about unwanted pregnancies,  the same set of students felt that with the right protection such a problem
will not arise.  But then again, it is a known fact that a condom can only be 95 to 97%  effective. Pallavi Mehta, a journalism student, says that abortions are  found, more than rarely, among those her age.

Most don’t want to lose out on the fun aspect of life, she says, adding that abortions are the only way out of a pregnancy, unless the girl would rather spend her days raising a child instead of going out and living her
own life.

According to counsellors and parents, there are several reasons why  youngsters are experimenting with sex. In India, you need to be 16 to have a  sexual relationship; that’s the legal age. Affluence, changing lifestyles,
free access and consumption of alcohol and drugs allow young adults to shed  inhibitions faster.

Peer pressure and broken homes result in an increased urge to experiment.  “It is for this reason that it is necessary to have sex education in schools  as well as at homes today”, says a counsellor.  M Bhatt, a banker, agrees with this view. “Advertisements and TV serials  talk of westernised lifestyles. Our kids are exposed to this and are  naturally drawn in at a very young age,” he says.  Pre-marital sex is no longer an unspoken taboo; it is a reality that must  be accepted and dealt with. And awareness is the first step towards this.

With evolving trends in society, it is necessary to ensure the open availability of worthwhile information on sex.
Stereotyping sex into a taboo by a large chunk of society will only  complicate matters for future generations. That is a big worry.

http://epaper.dnaindia.com/dnabangalore/newsview.aspx?eddate=12/24/2008&pageno=4&edition=9&prntid=389&bxid=27935846&pgno=4

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Woman jailed for issuing fake medical certificates

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 13, 2008

Yahoo News

Chandigarh, Dec 6 (IANS) A woman government doctor was Saturday sentenced to one year’s rigorous imprisonment by a special Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI) court here for issuing fake medical certificates.

The doctor, Asha Kiran, was caught red-handed by the CBI along with her husband Vinod Kumar while issuing a fake medical certificate to a woman for money here in 2001.

Joginder Kaur, who got a fake medical certificate from Kiran, was working with the Chandigarh health department, and presented the medical certificate in the Punjab and Haryana High Court to get bail on medical grounds in a murder case.

The complainant in the murder case got a whiff of the fake medical certificate and sent a decoy patient to Kiran. The patient was asked to pay Rs.6,000 for a fake certificate.

The CBI then laid a trap and nabbed Kiran.

http://in.news.yahoo.com/43/20081206/812/tnl-doctor-jailed-for-issuing-fake-medic.html

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Case boomerangs on dowry givers

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on December 13, 2008

This may act as a reminder that “giving” dowry is also an offence. In perhaps the first of its kind case, a Noida court has ordered the registration of a criminal case against a woman, her parents and brother for allegedly giving dowry.

The Noida chief judicial magistrate ordered the registration of an FIR against Sarita (name changed) and her family members after her husband Hari (name changed) filed a complaint alleging that they were trying to extort money by filing a dowry demand case against him. Hari is an engineer.

Hari, who spent a week in jail after the allegation, said the police did not verify the financial background of his in-laws who claimed they had given Rs 12 lakh and a Maruti Alto as dowry to him.

Hari also contended that, in any case, dowry-givers are considered accomplices under the Dowry Prohibition Act. Hari used the Right to Information (RTI) Act to challenge his wife’s claim and the police’s refusal to register a case on his complaint.

The RTI reply showed that the police registered the case against Hari on the verbal complaint of Sarita and that the charges against him were never verified, his counsel Pradeep Nawari said.

The Delhi High Court had recently said women or their parents who go ahead with marriage despite dowry demands from the bridegroom’s side would have to be seen as “accomplices to the crime” and “will face prosecution” under the Dowry Prohibition Act.

Newspaper link: Court orders FIR against wife

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