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Men gang up to take on Section 498 (A) misuse

Posted by iluvshrutiverma on May 19, 2009

This is Mahesh Kalge, a techie. He and his folks were charged for his wife’s suicide. The only thing is, his wife is alive and kicking. He says she misused the law to torture him.
By Chaitraly Deshmukh
Posted On Friday, May 15, 2009 at 05:16:08 AM

Kalge tells his story

We were to shift to a new flat in Chinchwad. My wife was angry  because my parents were to stay with us. On Dec 28, 2007, she drank ‘poison’ and informed my mother. My mother took her to Lokmanya Hospital. After she was cured, my mother informed her family. They then came with 60 people, abused us and filed a case against us under Section 498 (A). The next day, when we applied for bail, the police slapped a case of suicide abetment. We were put in jail for 27 days, while my wife went to live with her parents taking 37 tolas of gold and my infant son. In Nov ‘08, a chargesheet was filed against us. Only then I knew she was alive. Since then I have been involved with Save Family.”

Mahesh Kalge (30), a techie from Chinchwad, was arrested along with his parents in December ‘07 for their alleged involvement in abetting the suicide of his estranged wife.

Kalge’s wife had left their house, accusing him and his family of harassing her. As a result they had to spend several days in jail. He is now taking on the law that makes villians out of even good men — and there are many like him.

Who wronged whom
Recalling the agony, Mahesh says, “We were about to shift to a new flat. My wife was angry as my parents were to stay with us.

On December 28, ‘07, she gulped poison and immediately informed my mother. My mother promptly took her to Lokmanya Hospital where she was admitted and cured.”

He adds, “After she recovered, my mother informed her parents about the incident. That evening, they arrived with 50-60 people, abused and manhandled my parents, my married sister and me.

Then they filed a case against us under Indian Penal Code section 498 (A) and we were arrested. The next day, when we applied for bail, the police slapped us with IPC section 306 for abetting suicide.

We languished in jail for 27 days while my wife went to live with her parents taking 37 tolas of gold and other belongings from my house. That was the last time I saw my son. He was five months old.”

“In November ‘08, a chargesheet was filed against us. Then I realised she was still alive, living with her parents. I  started looking for information on misuse of laws and came to know about SFII.

I‘ve been associated with them ever since. Although I am not a lawyer, I know most laws protecting women now. In fact, the police should have filed a case for attempted suicide against my wife but she got away with it and we suffered.”

Mission save the family

According to the law

Article 498A of the IPC states that if a husband or any of his relatives subject the wife to cruelty which could drive her to commit suicide, seriously harm her physically or mentally in any way or unlawfully demand any
property or money from her, they are liable to be imprisoned for upto three years and also may be liable to pay a fine.

Today Mahesh is a member of Save Family, a subsidiary of the Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF), and vehemently promotes that various provisions of the Indian Penal Code (IPC), the Dowry Prohibition Act, 1961, the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005,  the Criminal Procedure Code, 1973, under the relevant provisions of the Hindu Marriage Act, the Special Marriages Act and Guardians and Wards Act, 1890 are being used by women to harass men.

To support his argument, he quotes the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) report, “The acts once promulgated to protect women are now taking their toll on men.

While 52,483 married men committed suicide , in ‘05, across the country in ‘06 it went up to 55,452. The number of married women committing suicide was 28,188 in ‘05 and 29,869 in ‘07.”

“NCRB’s findings reveal unscrupulous women who attack husbands and in-laws with frivolous dowry torture complaints is a chief causes of suicides among married men. Section 498 (A) of the IPC has been handy for women to torture their husbands and in-laws.”

Women are not abusers
Of course, womens’ organisations refuse to buy his argument. Julia George, a lawyer and nun associated with the Pune’s Stree Wani says, “The law is never misused. Women  do not usually take such drastic measures.”

Dr Neelam Gorhe, founder, Stree Adhar Kendra, says, “Most women never misuse laws. There may be  few cases where they have acted on the wrong advice of lawyers and resorted to such tactics, but most harassment cases are real. If conviction rates in such cases is as low as 10 per cent, it is because they aren’t investigated  well.”

SIFF-ting through issues
But Mahesh refuses to accept this. “We are not against laws that protect women. We are against women who misuse them. We are specifically fighting against the abuse of old, sick people and kids.

We are fighting against wives who force men to disown parents and live as per their wishes or force in-laws on their husbands.

We’re trying to create   awareness of ‘legal terrorism’ going on in the name of women’s empowerment. We are trying to protect the Indian family system from the onslaught of greedy and unscrupulous women,” he says.

“In Pune, SIFF has successfully executed mass awareness campaigns by staging dharnas and rallies to encourage victims to come forward and protest against the misuse of laws by women.

We hold counselling sessions, run a toll-free helpline for harassed men and offer advice online. We are working constructively,” he says.

Mahesh accuses the cops of being high-handed when acting on harassment complaints by women. “The law is partial to begin with. To make matters worse, police do not spare senior citizens alleged to be tormentors.

They are detained, arrested and put in jail on the basis of the complainant’s word. Proper investigations don’t take place and at times there are attempts to misrepresent the case to the judiciary,” he says.

The law’s fair
But Gorhe denies the law is partial. She insists, “Laws are not made in a hurry. All aspects are considered while drafting bills and promulgating them.

Laws are the pillar of the Indian Constitution. We never misrepresent cases. All we do is encourage distressed women to take a stand and help them.

If a woman rightfully demands money for her sustenance, how can it be an abuse of the law? This is nothing but propaganda by men who have trouble with the law,” she fumes.

Julia George feels such cases must be handled with care. “Even I avoid asking women to file cases under the IPC which may result in widening the rift. Normally women too are sensitive towards their spouses and in-laws and are reluctant to lodge criminal cases.

To file a criminal case, a woman has to struggle a lot and convince police officials. I feel the Domestic Violence Act is the best tool to deal with such cases. It leaves open the possibility for a reunion,” she says.

30 Responses to “Men gang up to take on Section 498 (A) misuse”

  1. The sad reality is that these laws are tilted in the favour of women,forgetting that women are no saints!!Their rampant misuse has made it very clear to all of us that to presume that woman all the time behaves like lamb is sheer ignorance about the true nature of women.

    It’s time to be realistic about the true nature about women but that does not mean we should try to ignore the troubles of a harassed lady.Let us heed to the wants of a genuine lady but let not at all allow the wrong women to create a heavy mess under the umbrella of women related laws !!That can only be done by amending the present laws related with crimes against women.There is urgent need to redefine the certain clauses in these laws.It’s really hard to imagine what has prevented the law makers to view the recent developments from a realistic angle?Why they assume that women can never do any wrong?

  2. HelloIndia said


    My ex wife and I applied for a mutually consented divorce. I work in the US and now have a date for the final decree in dec. Today I came to know that the district judge will be gone on vacation at the time of court date and I would need to get a new date. This is tough for me because my program and tickets are all booked and getting a vacation for an extended period of time during this economic environment can make me lose my job.
    The only thing remaining is my statement and signatures as during the initial filing my GPA(general Power of Attorney) signed on my behalf. The girl has already signed the petition.
    My question is, if there any sub-judge or someone else in the court who can handle my case while the judge is on vacation?

    Any kind of suggestions would help.

    • iluvshrutiverma said


      Why do you need to be there?

      Since GPA was accepted by the Honorable Court in the first motion. I am quite certain that it would be accepted by the court now too.

      Such things become a problem only when the opposite party objects. All these are not an issue in mutual consent divorces.

      Good luck with the next chapter in your life.

  3. HelloIndia said


    The problem is the girl’s father wants me to come and my lawyers also feel that I should come and sign the papers or give my statement in the court, that I want the divorce. I do not understand this condition because I sent the attested(by a notary as well as the Indian Consulate)GPA which basically means I am in agreement and want the divorce.

    • iluvshrutiverma said


      Doesn’t your gut feeling tell you that something is fishy here?

      Girl’s father surely does not want you to be there so that he can garland you.

      If I were you, I would not go even if I had spare holidays. If something can be done without your presence, why are they insisting on your presence?

      About the lawyer, please remember that hardly any lawyer is competent as well as trustworthy. Ask him why is the GPA not acceptable in second motion IF it was accepted in the first motion?

      And this does not seem to be a mutual consent divorce to me. The girl’s party would not have been doing all this drama. They seem to be interested in creating more chaos.

      Without any specific details about how old are you both, which all cases were there apart from sec 13 (divorce), what are the mutual consent terms and conditions, this is the best I could advice. Hope it helps.

  4. HelloIndia said


    It is not the girl’s father alone it seems the judge too does not want to take any chance. My lawyers are my family and very competent ones.

    Besides this my question is if the judge(district/session judge) is on vacation, can someone else give the decree(divorce) to us? I mean some sub-judge etc?

    • Kevin said

      HelloIndia – On one hand you say your lawyers are very competent, and on the other hand you are asking for legal advice in an online forum – both can not be true at the same time.

      Another point – it looks like you have paid your wife to buy divorce. I am saying this for two reasons – one because your wife is still thinking of creating more problems for you (her revenge is not yet over), second because you are not disclosing the terms and conditions of your divorce.

  5. HelloIndia said

    It is just a second opinion I am trying to get here and it does not mean my lawyers are incompetent.

    There are no terms and conditions. This is a plain and simple out of the court settlement where we gave them money to finish this fast. The police complaint which was filed by her was quashed by the police on the recommendation of the public prosecuter as it was false and the proof provided by me to counter that went against them and proved that the complaint was lies.

    We just paid the money as we wanted this crap to end fast and not linger on in the courts. I hope you get the things clearly now.
    I do not think I said she is thinking of creating problems as there is nothing remaining in this. My only question was about the final decree being issued by any other authority besides the district judge while he is on leave.

    • Kevin said

      HelloIndia – these blogs are not for weak men who pay up.

      Why do you guys pay up? What is the point in basking in the glory of your success about the police complaint quashing now? She wanted money and you gave her money. She won and you lost.

      The intention of my post is not to insult you. An average man is like you. But do you realize that others are suffering because of your actions? My wife created trouble for me because 1000 others like you paid up and created success stories for bad wives.

      When one man pays up, his wife will go and tell 10 others about her money making success, and therefore others get inspired.

      Imagine the day men stop to pay, wives will stop to file these cases.

    • prassoon said

      HelloIndia – Would you mind to let the readers know how much money did you pay to save your parents from heart attack?

  6. HelloIndia said


    Don’t compare cases or situations. My parents were suffering just thinking about the whole thing. For me money is secondary. If you can see your loved one having a heart attack and you still do not want to pay then good luck.
    For me money is secondary and my loved ones health much more important. There are other ways to fight this and i am and I will be doing that.

    • Kevin said


      It is a misconception that your case/ situation is much different thatn others.

      You think any husband’s parents will be enjoying these cases? Arent all the parents old and suffering from weakness and illness?

      The factors that compel the husband to pay up are very similar – aged parents suffering, younger siblings marriage not happening, job prospects suffering because of court travel etc.

      Still, people who have self-respect fight back, they do not give into extortion.

      • JASBIR SINGH said

        I AM AGAIN AGREE i think we can not extend our , parents life span by giving extortion to the culprit women it will enhancees their confidence level that ‘ ekk bakkra tow halaal kar dia abb dujae ki baari ayee ‘ , any thing bad or good will happens when that time come we can not change misfortune that is awating us so we should be more paitence , tolrable , stonger as before the accident [maariage

  7. HelloIndia said

    To each his own.

    Don’t even talk about self respect. I can see your care for your parents. For you right now it is revenge and money that you do not want to shell out and throw on the girl’s family even if the family suffers.

    Well that is you persepective at looking at things and mine is different. Anyways good luck with whatever you are trying to achieve or accomplish. I have my own way of teaching them a leason and I will.
    Good luck

    • Kevin said

      It is all about self-respect. Weak spineless men hide their weakness in the name of their old parents.

      As I mentioned earlier, which parents are young? All the parents are old. And the problems that the husbands face are standard. Just that people who have some self-respect fight back. The others forget all the torture that was done to them (and their parents) by their wives, and just bow down in front of all the illegitimate demands of the wife.

      She has won, you have lost. Accept it. The ‘plan’ that you often refer to – is also because you are temporarily upset about her victory. This feeling of ‘revenge’ will also go away in sometime. Think about it – you will harm her. Then will she not harm you/ parents back? So in the best interest of your parents, it is best that you just forget all the pain and suffering.

  8. HelloIndia said

    Good Luck Dude.

    I am not upset or anything. It has been a long time. I nor did my parents go to jail or anything. Your perspective of looking at things is different. The kind of family I come from we did not want to get involved in such cheap gimics nor did I want my parents to stand in the court. Our reputation and family honor was too much of an issue for us and not a few lakhs of rupees.

    For everyone there is a different way of looking at things. Ours is different and yours is different.
    I hope you WIN the way you want to.

    With regards to my taking revenge, I will let you know when and how I do that. There is a process and way to do things and I know what and how I will be doing that. Everything is not about causing physical harm to the other party. I can easily do that in a minute call but that is not going to accomplish anything in the long run.

    Relax and wait for your turn to come. Good Luck once again and do not use words like ‘spineless’ for someone whose problems or issues you do not know about. Just because you were beaten up or tortured and I have not taken that route does not mean I am spineless. I can also do or get similar things done but that is wrong. So just relax

  9. prassoon said

    Kabhi kabhi kuch jeetne ke liye kuch harna bhi padta hai. Aur har kar jeetne walon ko Baazigar kehte hain, kya kehte hain? Baazigar.

    Apne athamabhimaan kho kar “zindagi” jeethne walom ko HelloIndia kahte he LOL

    They think fight against EVIL is “loosing reputation”. A different way of looking at things!

    i agree with HelloIndia ; only NUTS will use words like ‘spineless’. These kinda people jo apne aap ko Baazigar kahte ho, they DO have spine, but made of RUBBER.. it cant stand straight and bows down every where.

  10. Suresh ram said

    “My …….. For me money is secondary. If you can see your loved one having a heart attack and you still do not want to pay then good luck.”
    We also pay to the doctor. Not to the Blackmailer.

    You lack what we call “self esteem” and ‘ self respect”
    Don’t thing you alone have money and others are are fools fighting against injustice. Don’t bullshit here.

    Your object appears to be not sympathy towards your parents but lies somewhere between tighs.we don’t wish you “then good luck.” but more women filing false cases on you and your parents.

  11. HelloIndia said

    Suresh Ram,

    Why did you take dowry in the first place. You come across as a loser. People like you should be taken to jail and electric shock given to them.
    You guys are bullshitting here in the name justice.

    Also, go get a life and stop folling people here.

    This website is a farce in the first place.

    This shruti or whatever her name is screwed you and don’t you think creating this website for her is hypocracy?

    Go get a life guys.

    • prassoon said

      People who dont even have guts to use their own name are fags. They are living a borrowed life, just like they borrow names LOL. I’m laughing my ass off when such people asking others to “get a life” hahahahahaha…

      The term “DOWRY” itself is bogus and is used for extortion by fags like HelloIndia. The same thing will become GIFT when Police and Court turn back to them. Same is the situation of the term “RAPE”. Now Rape Dowry harrassment are been used only by prostitutes and fags to make money. Well, being a fag is not anyones fault.. what a cruel nature!!!

    • Prasanna said


      No sane person will be able to make out from the above conversation whether Suresh took dowry or not.

      About this website being farce – in the first place you were the one who came here asking for help. No one came to invite you.

      You are a loser in life. Your wife earlier made your life hell and now has sucked money out of you. And mind it, the quantum of money is not important. The very fact that you paid makes you a loser and makes her a winner.

      Do not take out your frustrations here.

  12. HelloIndia said

    You should start a loser club and become the office bearers. With this attitude towards women you will not find any woman.

  13. prassoon said

    hahahaha HelloIndia – is the sole purpose of your life to find woman? hhahahahaha

  14. HelloIndia said

    Prasoon..or whatever..dude first go get a haircut so that you look like a man atleast..right now I can’t figure out if the picture attached here is of a man or…

    • Kevin said

      HelloIndia –

      Eunuchs like you should not be talking about masculinity.

      You have proven that you are a eunuch, by paying up to a woman.

      I know you are frustrated because your your wife is a winner and you are a loser, and you will feel this pain through out your life.

    • prassoon said

      damn it… dont give evil look at me you fag… LOL

  15. HelloIndia said

    Kevin- A$%#^LES like you take dowry and then get screwed and then start all this drama about women issues. You people deserve the police thrashing and jail time.
    Do not f&%$k around on forums harping about the masculinity. Get a reality check m&*h%rf$@k2r.

    • prassoon said

      HelloIndia – All you can do is swearing when your wife had made you cough up all your life time earnings all your belongings and left you strand on the streets wearing pink chaddi.

      Anyway dont worry too much about that… please join the fight to curb this blackmail/extortion in the name of women empowerment. No one is against women empowerment but no one should ALLOW EXTORTION in the name of that and also women empowerment SHOULD NOT be at the cost of MEN, thats the key. If you feel ‘raped’, do what ever you can to curb this menance lawfully. All we have is sympathy on you, we know that you are swearing to cover up the deep scar on your heart gifted by your beloved wife.

  16. Kevin said

    Prassoon –

    Do not expect anything from eunuchs like HelloIndia.

    Actually they are not even eunuchs. Eunuchs are born that way. These are spineless men who do not have any self-respect, neither for themselves nor for their family.

    These are sex starved people with no personality for whom marriage is the only way to get sex, hence they are desperate to get divorce and marry again.

    So, all in all, do not expect them to fight back – neither with their own wives nor with the biased system. They are just born to be screwed. And I am glad that they get screwed.

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